Would he be jamming with the Village People, merrily singing YMCA and shaking a leg in the heavens. Or, would he be tossing and turning in his grave in Stockholm, wanting to re-evaluate the standards of the Foundation if it succumbs to the pressure from a wheeler-dealer like Donald Trump. Its Alfred Nobel and the Nobel Foundation we are talking about.
Trump wants Nobel Peace Prize. Why ? Knowing that modesty is not in his repertoire, he wouldn’t fight shy of brushing away the embarrassment inherent in his candidature. But, his nomination, let alone selection, is sure to embarrass the Norwegian Nobel Committee no end. He is the president of his country and, therefore, the conduct of the two is intertwined. Even in the context of consideration of his nomination by the Committee. Let’s revisit the conduct of the country and talk about the shenanigans of the Nobel-aspirant for peace. For peace?
Indians are not fond of the word “deal”. It is transactional in nature whereas, culturally, we seek relationships. A deal targets immediacy and quick-fix solutions, disregarding long-term sustainability of the outcomes. Trump, given the limitedness of his ability to think through the issues, is sold on the word “deal” and takes pride in being called a “dealer”. Building on his preoccupation, the ensuing text uses the word as a suffix to his name. The idea is to insult him.
America needs a moral rebirth.
One wouldn’t be an iota off the mark in saying that the USA is one country that talks unapologetically about wanting to bring peace to those very situations which they themselves have created or turned into bloody conflicts. After the World War II, there are 31 countries that the USA has interfered in, on one pretext or the other, and made (or tried to make) a mess of. A paper brought out by IBON Foundation says that the USA’s acts of aggression have resulted in some 13-23 million deaths in 28 countries. About 7-13 million deaths due to direct US military actions and 6-10 million deaths due to armed conflicts supported or instigated by it. None to miss the fact that most USA’s military actions abroad violate the UN provisions and international laws.
It is ironical that the president of a country desperately wants Nobel Prize for peace which has the largest military spending in the world, triple the next biggest spender (China) and more than the combined spending of top-20 countries globally. That a country which remorselessly rides on terrorists (in Pakistan, as confirmed by their Defence Minister), rebels (in Indonesia, Chile) and dictators (in Guatemala, Congo, El Salvador) but encourages its president to seek peace awards, is an open insult to the Nobel Foundation.
He is joking. Isn’t he ?
Trump-the-Dealer is mentally unstable, uncivilized, narcissistic, hypocrite and cerebrally-challenged. Every time I look at him or hear him, I fall in love with the crassest of politicians in India. I swear, I do. Look at uncouthness and total lack of substance in his interactions with his own officials, media-persons, businessmen and heads of other countries. He conducts himself exactly like the rowdies who he wants to evict from the streets of Washington DC. He has yet to clear his name in the Epstein (under-age sex) saga and make public all files / reports, as promised. He has to come clean on unethical use of his position on many business deals overseas including cryptocurrencies deals and the real estate & luxury hotel deals. He cannot fool the world that there is no quid pro quo. Americans still remember this man as one who deployed military against his own countrymen. He funds or aids a host of military campaigns across the world and has the temerity to call himself a peace-maker and a unifier. Knowing that Trump-the-Dealer can stoop to any extent, one hopes that it is just a rumour that he had threatened the Norwegian Finance Minister of heavy tariffs if he didn’t get the prize. If he is not joking about his chase for a Nobel, the joke would be on the world. A dark one at that.
What does he want it for.
“What the hell he got it for”, he had quipped when Barrak Obama, former President of the USA, got the Nobel. The same question needs to be asked of the Trump-the-Dealer today. He has been tom-toming about five peace deals (out of which one is a no-deal) which he takes the credit for. Let’s get clarity as to what these deals actually are. Or, are they deals at all.
There is a continuing dispute, dating back to 1904, between Cambodia and Thailand relating to border demarcation. In 1962, the International Court of Justice (ICJ) ruled Cambodian sovereignty over an ancient temple, Preah Vihear. But the sovereignty over the surrounding areas wasn’t settled. The clashes between the two countries in July-2025 led to unfortunate death of 38 people. Trump-the-Dealer intervened and the two countries agreed to a ceasefire. He became a legend in his own mind. Border clashes have ceased? Yes. Permanently? Certainly, not. Can the border clashes erupt again? Yes, anytime. Has the key issue of border demarcation been addressed? Of course not, silly. What, therefore, Trump took the credit for? It’s a million non-dollar question.
Trump-the-Dealer brokered a deal between Armenia and Azerbaijan in August-2025. The deal envisages creation of a transit corridor through Armenia, linking Azerbaijan to its exclave of Nakhchivan. A true megalomaniac, can you believe he wants the route named “Trump Route for International Peace and Prosperity”. It didn’t stop there. The Shylock in him insisted that the USA gets the development rights for the route which, most likely, would be contracted out to Trump-family companies. But who will ensure legal enforceability of the deal. No one knows. Iran, a neighbor, has rejected the proposed corridor along their border and warned that it would become a graveyard for Trump’s mercenaries. Russia, another neighbor and a potential dealbreaker, has not yet endorsed the proposal. Evidently, it’s a deal only on paper with no buy-in from the important stakeholders who can put a big spanner in the wheels. So what if the deal doesn’t take off the ground, Trump-the-Dealer can pat his own back and add the deal to his CV.
The Central African countries, Rwanda and the Democratic Republic of Congo (DRC), have been in conflict since 2022. The DRC accuses Rwandan forces of supporting the rebels called March 23 Movement (M23M). Rwanda, in turn, accuses the DRC of supporting a paramilitary group called Democratic Forces for the Liberation of Rwanda (FDLR). The leaders of the two countries signed a peace agreement in June-2025 to end the conflict. Africa is a growing continent, hugely respectful of its tribal heritage and values. Any initiative to end violence is welcome. But it is naïve to expect the warring countries to end all conflicts all of a sudden because Trump-the-Dealer urged them to. There is a deep-rooted, historical mistrust between Hutis and Tutsis. Also, the citizenry wouldn’t easily accept a deal brokered by whites as memories of their brutality (especially in DRC which witnessed killing & maiming of millions of Congolese by the Belgians) are chillingly alive. The warring groups on ground, M23M and FDLR, are neither party to this agreement nor have they endorsed it. The borders between the two countries are open and no way can anyone prevent entry or exit, rendering the promise of no-aggression impractical. Plus, there is this issue of critical mineral supplies from the DRC which may turn out to be a party-popper. Remember, Trump-the-Dealer is a mercenary. He plans to extract his pound of flesh from this deal and has “indicated” that the USA would “invest” in DRC’s mining industry. It is for all to see that for him mining is the real deal and peace is incidental. Trump-the-Dealer was all over himself and rushed to play his favourite song, ironically titled “Is that all there is”. He had to hurry as the deadline for nominations to Nobel is round the corner.
One may want to give some credit to Trump-the-Dealer for intervening in the Russia-Ukraine war if it actually stops one day. His pre-election promise, in foolish overestimation of his influence and power, of stopping the war in one day notwithstanding. It’s been almost four years since the war broke out. Both Russia and Ukraine are tired. Ukraine is destroyed, almost completely, and needs to wriggle out of this continuing destruction. Russia is big, militarily powerful and has demonstrated its capability to sustain itself despite multiple international sanctions. Putin too has had enough and shall be happy to end the war. Only if a large part of his pre-war position is validated. If that happens, Ukraine would have been made a royal fool of by both America and Europe. For Zelensky, if nothing else, the war would have earned him international fame as a comedian, almost comparable to our own Kapil Sharma (the famous standup comedian). By the time the nominations for the 2026 edition of the Nobel prize close, Trump-the-Dealer would have bartered half of Ukraine to Russia, claimed proprietary rights over Ukraine’s rich mineral deposits, secured almost all major contracts to rebuild the country for Trump-family companies (leaving out smaller, less-lucrative ones to Europe) and ensured killing of all prospects of Ukraine associating with NATO. These would be the wages of war and the kickbacks of peace deal. Dealt with (pun intended) by Trump-the-Dealer, Zelensky would be left scratching his scrotum, wondering if he is coming or going.
Trump-the-Dealer dare not add cessation of India’s offensive (Operation Sindoor) to destroy terrorist camps & infrastructure in Pakistan and Pakistan-occupied-Kashmir (PoK) to his peace credentials. India has maintained a firm stand, at all times and at all forums, that it does not require any mediation when it comes to dealing with the terrorist state. The country has gone on record saying that the Operation Sindoor still continues and, as and when appropriate, more offensives shall be carried out. An unequivocal denial about Trump-the-Dealer’s involvement has been placed in the Indian parliament in July-2025. He can cry himself hoarse and continue to spread the falsehood of his intervention for the 32nd time to further his Nobel ambitions.
Whilst on the subject, during its offensive against the terror camps & infrastructure in Pakistan and PoK, India is reported to have bombed two sites i.e., Kirana Hills (storing nuclear warheads) and Nur Khan Air Base (adjacent Pakistan’s nuclear command and housing transport, surveillance and combat aircrafts), inflicting damage of consequence. Though Indian military officials denied the incidents (with an innocently wicked smile), there is a strong grapevine, supported by satellite imagery, videos, images and maps shared by experts and social media handles. Pushing everything in the background, there are two shocking whispers gaining traction. Did the nuclear warheads stored in the Kirana Hills belong to the USA ? Is Nur Khan base actually a secret American base which suffered damage to its F-16 aircrafts during the Indian offensive? The world needs to know the truth and also who these nuclear warheads and aircrafts were to be used against. So much for the international peace by a country whose president wants to acquire for himself a Nobel for peace any which way.
Who would sign (or not) ?
Trump-the-Dealer is ecstatic that a terrorist state like Pakistan has nominated him for Nobel for peace and, in the same breath, issued a threat from the American soil itself, to nuke and destroy half the world. Coming to others, he would certainly extract nominations out of Cambodia, Thailand, Rwanda, DRC, Armenia and Azerbaijan for having dealt (pun intended, again) them deals. He may avoid a formal nomination from Israel, which can, otherwise, cost him his next USD 400 million luxury jet gift by angry Arab nations. Coming to Ukraine, Trump-the-Dealer would buy a testicles-crusher on Amazon and use it on poor Zelensky if he doesn’t use Trump’s pen to sign the nomination form. Trump-the Dealer’s current bête noire i.e., BRICS (Brazil, Russia, India, China and South Africa) and BRICS+ (Egypt, Ethiopia, Indonesia, Iran, Saudi Arabia and UAE) would be happy to accompany him to the venue of prize distribution if he concedes to co-habit with their agenda (i.e., intra-group cooperation on trade & defence, alternativization of dollar, energy independence and de-coupling their economies from the west). Canada, Mexico, France, Germany, Italy, UK etc. would ideally want to burn his Nobel nomination forms. Countries like Iran, North Korea, Yemen, Lebanon, Syria, Venezuela, Cuba and Belarus would want to use the nomination forms, with Trump’s name printed thereon, to wipe their you-know-what.